In the latest episode of "24", Jack Bauer is rescued by a troop of marines. They used actual marines for the sequence, giving maybe one of the best reasons I've ever heard:

"They've got all the helicopters"

Here's an article about the episode and the dedication to a marine pilot killed a few weeks previously, just before the Squadron came home:

At the end of Monday's "24," a photo of a military pilot appeared, with
these words: "This episode is dedicated to the memory of Lt. Col. Dave
Greene of the Marine Light Attack Helicopter Squadron 775."

The screen then faded to black, and these words appeared: "His sacrifice,
and the sacrifice of all our men and women of the military, will never be
forgotten."

Greene, who died in Iraq in July, had been part of the Marine unit that
appeared on Monday's episode. On the episode, which revolved around the
freeing of the show's fictional secretary of defense from terrorists, those
were real Marines who swooped in on helicopters and rappelled down ropes in
the rescue attempt.

"That group [of Marines] had just come back from Iraq, just weeks before we
shot that episode" in October, says "24" producer Tim Iacofano, who worked
with the Marines' film and TV liaison office to arrange the unit's
appearance.

After filming was completed, Lt. Col. Eric Buer, who had served with Greene
for 13 years, asked Iacofano if the show could pay tribute to Greene.

"I asked around Fox and the people I work for and everyone kind of felt it
was the least we could do," Iacofano says.

Maj. Mark Voelker, who knew Greene, set up a screening of Monday's "24" at
Camp Pendleton, Calif., where the reserve unit Greene belonged to is based.
Voelker watched it with about a dozen other Marines who had served with the
fallen pilot, including Buer.

"As we watched, at the end it got pretty quiet," Voelker says. "After the
ending played, the response was that it was perfect. It was exactly what
anyone would have liked to have seen."

The squadron took Greene's death hard, Voelker says, because it was very
close to returning to the U.S. when Greene's helicopter was shot down.

"Everyone had started to see the light at the end of the tunnel, and thought
everyone [from the unit] was going to come back," Voelker says.

"He was one of the most impressive lieutenant colonels we had, that's what
made his loss that much more unfortunate," Voelker says.

Not only was the tribute to Greene appreciated, Voelker says, the depiction
of what Marines do was also well-received.

"What was done for the TV show was extremely accurate," Voelker says.
"That's how things would have looked in reality. We were saying today that
the show must have good advisers or are pretty in tune with the reality" of
Marine combined air-land operations.

For the October shoot, there were between 50 and 75 Marines on the "24" set:
six pilots, dozens of Marines aboard the helicopters and an array of safety
and training instructors.

"For them, it was a training mission, so we had to conform to all their
rules for safety," Iacofano says.

As for why "24" ended up calling in real Marines to rescue William Devane's
fictional defense secretary, Iacofano says, "Helicopters are really hard to
come by. They have all the helicopters and the guys trained to do that
stuff. We've done roping with stunt men, but that's pretty tricky.

"There's a weight distribution problem -- guys have to go out either side of
the helicopter at the same time, or the thing could tip over. It could get
quite dangerous. But that's something these Marines are trained to do."

Maj. Jeff Nyhart, who works in the Marines' film and TV liaison office, said
that given the armed forces' many duties around the world these days, it's
sometimes difficult to find what film and TV producers are looking for.

"It's not easy," Nyhart says. "Training cycles are so intensive right now,
and anything that interferes with operational commitments is not
supportable."

But after a bit of looking around, the Marines entertainment-industry
liaison office in L.A. was able to find a unit that does the kind of
land-air operation that the "24" producers were looking for.

As for the on-screen depiction of "calling in the Marines," "it was great,"
Nyhart says. "It was Marines doing what they do."

Micheal Moore's "Farenheit 9/11" was on Channel 4 last night.

Ever since the invasion of Iraq was announced, I've been forced to sit on the fence. I have never managed to find a convincing enough argument either for or against the invasion. As many times as someone points out how Saddam had nothing to do with 9/11 (true) and didn't have a working relationship with Al-Quaeda (true) and he shouldn't have been invaded, but negotiated with, someone else points out that Saddam was an evil man who murdered mutilated and terrorised his own population for 25 years (true) and he deserved to go.

In strict terms of being part of the War on Terror and an attack on a terrorist regime, the invasion was unfounded. But undeniably Saddam had to go.

I'm on the fence about the resulting American occupation of Iraq. On one hand, it's evidence of the US's arrogance, corruption and imperialism, but on the other hand, Iraq actually doesn't have any military force which could take over. The country would rapidly descend into bloody civil war or simple all-out chaos if the coalition troops left.

I really can't see how I can fall into one side of the argument or the other.

So I was very interested in "Farenheit 9/11"

What a dissappointment. Moore doesn't provide any easily checkable proofs, but relies on pathos and emotional blackmail to present that which comes across as a personal vendetta against George Bush. Now, there's no reason why this isn't a good thing, but it also strips any credibility from the film.

I can see as much wrong and as much to criticise in this film as I can about the whole situation.

So I'm still on the fence.

Iraq goes to the polls this weekend for the first time since 1954. Good luck to them.

I have wanted to leave Windoze behind for so long! Every now and then, I'd visit the Mandrake and Redhat websites and hover over the downlaod links for the latest version, but only bothered once, backed the three disk set up to CD-r's and forgot about them.

Until I had to use them to recover my knackered WinXP installation a few weeks ago.

I couldn't find my XP install disk, so had to install Linux in order to access the hard drive and rip the disk image I keep there.

So I did a bit of research, made sure I knew how to get the modem working, made sure I had all the files I was likely to need if I ran into problems, and decided "to hell with it".

We're two days in things are going fine. Did have some teething troubles with the modem, but that was easily sorted out with a little application of common sense.

And I got QUAKE working today! Ages ago, I found a copy of Quake 3 Arena for Linux and decided to pick it up. Never even looked at it since until I needed the CD key last year. Since then I've mistaken it for the Windoze version dozens of times, so I decided to see how it went. The in-game graphics are still not working, but the menus work and that's a good start.

Suck on that Bill Gates!

Apparently it takes 40 minutes for the pictures from the Titan probe to reach earth...

Which means it's quicker to get your pictures from Saturn than it is to get them from the shop up the road.

One of the funniest shows on the radio is Punt & Dennis's "It's been a bad week" on Radio 2. This week's edition has been a goldmine of excellent stories, including this one:

17 year old Greg Bulmarsh applied for a job at his local McDonalds restaurant. This is his application form:

NAME: Greg Bulmarsh

SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.

DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But seriousley, whatevers available. If i was in a position to be picky, i wouldn't be applying here in the first place.

DESIRED SALARY: $185000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovits style severance package. If thats not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

EDUCATION: Yes.

LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

SALARY: Less than i'm worth.

MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it-notes.

REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.

HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any

PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30pm., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment.

MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would i be here?

DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?

DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do you have a car that runs?"

HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing House Sweepstakes.

DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job no, on my breaks yes.

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS TIME?: living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blond model who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually I'd like to be doing that now.

DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Yes, absolutely

SIGN HERE: Aries

He got the job.

Anyone good at solving crossword clues?

Here's one for you:

Clue is "E", 13 letters

Another idea stolen from the Merry Piper:

Paste the first line from the first post of each month for 2004:

• January: Plenty of things to write about I hope...
• February: God January went fast!
• March: It's been a while eh?
• April: OK, just installed NewsGator into my copy of Outlook, along with the Blogspot posting plugin, so I’m posting this to test it out.
• May: Saturday Morning TV is not improving!
• June: Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
• July: There's been a bit in the News lately about the poverty gap, or specifically, the percieved difference in affluence between north and south.
• August: Get this: My results from the Neuroses-o-matic!
• September: As I posted an article on the Democratic Convention (see July's archive), I thought it would only be fair to post something about the Republican Connvention going on this week in New York.
• October: Urgh. Got a cold. Don't feel like blogging.
• November: We've been in the news! And helped lower the crime rate in the area to boot:
• December: Meet Stew

Meet the beast

I've waited thirteen years for one of them! Can't drive it yet, but I'm working on it. The biggest problem is the £1,000 insurance, so next time the ebay box appears in the left column, dig deep and contribute to the Hedgewitch Learner Driver Fund.

As promised...

For one reason or another, presumably the forthcoming election, drug abuse is back on the agenda in the media.

Usually, I'm averse to bandwagonism, but here's my two-pennyworth for the hell of it:

I'm not a user. Never touched a pill or a powder or a needle in my life. I was once offered a wrap of speed in exchange for bus fare. I turned it down because I wouldn't have had a clue what to do with it.

What I do like, however, is half a joint before bed. That's it. A very mild marijuana cigarette. I've been laughed at for how little I put in. I get more of a buzz off a pint of beer to be honest, but it's a pleasant and satisfying way of relaxing before bed. It's not something I miss when I run out.

Out of sheer curiosity and to see if it was possible without all the growlights and hydroponics and tinfoil, I once grew a couple of plants. I wasn't secretive about it, it sat on my living room windowsill, it was lovely and bushy and it produced nice strong stuff. I called him "weedy" and he was my friend. Unfortunately, cannabis plants have a limited life on British windowsills, especially considering how much pruning takes place, and he ended up dying and being all smoked up.

Anyway...

Lots has been said over the years about the pros and cons of legalising hard drugs like Heroin and Cocaine. The cons all allude to the death of modern society and anarchy and rampant addiction. What they seem to be forgetting is that not so long ago, all these drugs were not only legal, but were being used in pharmaceutical products and food. Famously, cocaine was part of "original recipe" coca cola, Speed was used as a slimming drug, heroin (or morphine) is still used in all kids of healthcare products: Codeine turns to morphine in your brain and cocaine is called novocane when the dentist injects it into your gums.

The fact is that these drugs have been or still are perfectly legal and society didn't come to an end.

Drug MISUSE, which is what the debate is all about, is a direct result of the profiteering immorality of the dealers.

Legalising and regulating hard drugs can only have a positive effect. Why would anyone go to a shady dealer for their £20 bag of horse laxatives and crushed paracetamol when they can pop to the local chemist for a hit of pure stuff for the same price or less?

The authorities are losing the war on drugs, the dealers are increasingly violent and drug abuse now affects every corner of our society. It's time to take a new angle, because what we're doing now just isn't enough.

You can't control something by driving it into the hands of more and more desperate criminals.

There's quite a debate going on in the DigitalSpy forums about the suitability of former Happy Mondays manc dancer Bez to stay in the Big Brother house whle suffering quite obvious signs of Cannabis withdrawal.

A lot of people are suggesting that he be arrested. Despite the fact that he hasn't actually DONE anythign illegal in the house. Despite the fact that maybe he went into the house kniowing it was a sealed environment and a very public way of going through cold turkey.

Undoubtedly, he has a habit. Undoubtedly, the withdrawal has hit him hard. But if these people want to see him off the drug, then by god, let him win. Keep him in the house until the very last second and keep him in the public eye for a week or two afterwards. The longer he stays in the house, the longer he stays off the weed and the better his chances of kicking his habit.

They want him kicked out now. Well, isn't that exactly what he wants? Isn't that the worst thing you could do for a recovering junkie?

At the end of the day, I very much doubt that past Big Brother contestants have been squeaky clean and drug free (with the notable, glaring exception of Cameron), and I doubt that everyone who's lambasting Bez is completely innocent either. He hasn't made any secret of his habit - his last words before entering the house were that he'd miss his weed the most. We knew this would happen, unless as I suspected, he was allowed to take a bit of stuff in with him as the luxury item he was cagey about when he walked in. It's quite a shame I was wrong. Would have loved to see them all getting stoned, with Endemol trying to cover it up.

So let he that is without vice cast the first stone. And if you've ever got wasted on a few too many bevvies, or dropped a couple of tabs on a friday night, or toked a bit of the wacky baccy at college, well, just leave the Bezmeister alone, alright? Addiction metes out it's own punishment. Rest assured, he'll get his due in time.

(More on my opinions on drugs later)

Is it really so wrong of me to expect my favourite blog authors to stay up till the wee small hours so I have something interesting to read?

C'mon people, never heard of pro-plus?

After my little speech about the comics I used to read, I started thinking about some other things that had inspired me through the years.

Here's one of them: The view from Harlech, looking towards Snowdonia and the majesty of the mountains.




OK, there's more spectacular sights in the world, but to me, growing up going on holiday there every year for a decade or more, waking up, opening the caravan curtain and seeing that view...well, inspiring just isn't the word.

To this day, I'm totally in love with Snowdonia, but I haven't been there for over ten years. As soon as I've passed my test, I'm going there: packed lunch in Bala, trip through the mountains, hairpin bends, whispering waterfalls and all, round the coast from Ffestiniog, Harlech, Dyffryn, Barmouth, then back home through the mountains.

Wonderful.

Just a mention of this big non-story:





I don't know what the fuss is about. He's just carrying on a long line of British Royal louts and layabouts, from the wonderfully outrageous George 3rd to the larger than life and hugely popular George 7th.

I can't help laughing when I hear about the latest exploits of Charles' offspring. It's about time we had an anarchic monarchy again. I know I'm gonna be happy growing old under King William 4th, anyway.

Blair vs Brown:

While Gordon Brown's safely tucked away in the heart of Africa, pledging £1billion in debt relief for the third world (nice one Gordon!), Tony's been taking (cautious) advantage.

In a speech in Kent yesterday, he praised his competitor, calling him the "most successful post-war chancellor" but then went on to insist that Labour's third term would be "Unremittingly New Labour" which will enrage Gordon and his supporters, as the chancellor is truly of the old guard.

And why is Gordon in Africa? Well, it looks hopeful: he's visiting AIDS-ravaged areas of Tanzania, Mozambique and South Africa and attending a conference where he hopes to help beat out an agreement on a multilateral plan to write off the IMF and World Bank debts of some of the poorest countries in the world.

However, the pill has already been bittered by everyone's favourite thorn in the side, Claire Short. She says, rightly, that merely eradicating the debt won't solve much. What needs to happen is stability and an end to corruption and conflict in the affected countries. And that can't be done by holding conferences.

Here's an article about his visit.

Look at these people:


She wouldn't (or couldn't - reports are contradictory on that point) have kids, so a few years ago they decided to try and adopt. At the end of 2002, they started a 13 week trial placement of three little kids, rescued from neglectful parents - Christian, aged 3, Nathan aged 2 and Chloe, just five months old. They'd thrived in Foster Care and Social Services insisted that they be placed together as they were incredibly close - as young, traumatised children would be.

The couple took care classes from a local nursery and were shown videos on the effect of neglect on children by Social Services. She couldn't be bothered and eventually, neither could he. They knew all of this, they'd read it all in books after all. They were graduates for god's sake, what could they learn from nannies and Social Workers?

These two wanted a perfect, ready made family and the children just didn't fit the bill.

The wife couldn't cope, so went back to work. The husband claimed he couldn't bond with them, phoning their Social Worker and insisting that their three year old prospective foster son was "brainless", "a vegetable" and "a zombie".

A few days later, he was dead.

He didn't bond with his prospective father. And is it any wonder, when he's being described like that to a Social Worker? Children with problems like Christian need unconditional love, vast patience, deep understanding and care. This was obviously something beyond the university educated engineer's understanding. Not everyone can be a parent. It's a tough life when your kids are your own, and well adjusted, and taking on someone elses emotionally damaged children is a challenge I as a father of two manic powerhouses would balk at.

Ian and Angela Gay, however were sure they knew better. They were convinced that the children they adopted owuld be pleasant, well adjusted, pictures of perfection and on the off-chance that they might not fit the required profile, well they'd just have to be punished.

Punished by being force fed spoonful after spoonful of salt. Punished by being shaken and slapped around the head. Punished so severely that it produced a brain haemorrhage. In a three year old child.

Little Christian was sent to his sister's cot for misbehaving. Ian later found him comatose and the couple rushed him to hospital. He was placed on life support. Angela went back to work.

Four days later they switched off his life support.

Yesterday, Ian and Angela Gay were convicted of manslaughter and sent to prison for five years. Five years for torturing a defenceless toddler to death.

This is a picture of him:


And here's a couple of links to the story in the press:

A report on the outcome of the trial
and details of the help the couple were given

My opinion? They're selfish, evil bastards who should be banned from contact with children for life. Lock 'em up and throw away the key.

Am I being harsh? Take note of what Angela's father says after the trial:
"We're totally shocked. They know they have done nothing wrong. It's an injustice."

I used to read a sci-fi comic called 2000ad. Brilliant comic. I've still got hundreds of issues of it lounging in my parent's loft.

Also up there is an almost full collection of a spinoff comic they produced in the early 90's called "Crisis". It didn't last long and was really a mouthpiece for the editor and writers to sound off about the state of the world we live in. The main strip in the comic was one called "Third World War" which was set at the turn of the millenium.

The premise was that Multinational Corporations co-opted workers from Britain and sent them to work in South America and so forth. This gave the writers an opportunity to show the corporate horror machine in all it's glory. The interesting bit though were the notes and references peppered throughout the story, references to essays, economic reports, articles, books, Chumbawamba and Dead Kennedys lyrics which backed up the stories they were writing.

Following those notes clued me in about all the things I care about in the world. What I learned from reading "Crisis" has kept me watching the Business News for twelve years, led me to predict the current downslide of the American economy post-9/11, pre-warned me to look into the economic backstory of the tragedies we hear about. Because let's make no mistake - the enemy isn't some shady figure with diabetes hiding in a cave in Afghanistan, the real enemy is on our feet and issuing our Credit Cards and providing us with Big Mac, Coke and Fries to go.

One soundbite from the comic has always stuck with me though. It refers to the almost constant state of civil war in Africa and the battle between Multinationals and the populations of Africa and South America. It refers to what our Governments and Big Business do in our name in those countries and how the populations of thoes countries really feel about what's happening to them.
And even though it wasn't relevant at the time, it refers just as much to the actions of our glorious Western Alliance and the Islamic Fundamentalists they're supposed to be looking for.

The quote is this:

"If you want to avoid wargasm, stop fucking the third world"

Did you buy the "Band Aid 20" single? Did you watch the Vicar of Dibley on New Years Day? Then you might know about the "Make Poverty History" campaign.

If you don't, well, you can click on the white band over there <--- or you can click on the link up there ^

But please do one or the other.

Third world debt is a subject I've followed for almost half my life. Poor countries are being made poorer - far poorer - because of repayments our Governments demand from them. We don't need the money, we mostly don't get the money and when we originally gave the money, it went into the pockets of corrupt, even warmongering politicians.

What we've needed to see for years now is the abolishment of third world debt. We're making the poorest countries in the world far poorer by demanding they repay the money they were lent decades ago.

And because of that debt, thousands of people die every day for no other reason that they just don't have enough. Of anything.

I remember Michael Burke's news report from Ethiopia in 1984. I remember how it affected me. I can bring to mind everything I've read since about how the situation in Ethiopia and other places in Africa came about and it devastates me. I feel shame that I can't do more, but I also need to put food in my children's mouths and because of this, I can do very little.

Something I can do is spread the word about campaigns and organisations that CAN make a difference, or that have more of a chance of being heard.

I've talked before about how America has a duty of care to the rest of the world as it's the most powerful country. Well, it's not just America. We all have a duty of care to those who are worse off, and that duty becomes more important as the people become less well off.

I've been down. By god, I've been low. We've had days where everything looked lost, where our home, our lives looked to be at risk, but we pulled through. We coped and we came out the other side of the crisis. Thousands of people every day don't pull through.

Every day, thousands of men, women, children, babies have nothing left to do but lie down in the dust and die because their Governments and our Governments value money and power over basic human compassion.

So what I'm going to do now is steel myself, take my burden of shame and grief that I live in a country that contributes to the deaths of tens of thousands of people on a daily basis and I'm going to walk out among people who would rant at me and hurl abuse at me because I'm not patriotic, because I don't feel proud to live here.

I'm going to let my knowledge guide me through my life and focus me into doing my best to get into a position where I can make a difference. One day, and it might take another thirty years, I'll get there.

Until then, I'll watch and weep with everyone else.

People of a certain age (mine, for example) will remember getting lightsabres for christmas or birthdays. They were the must-have toy of the 70's.

Well now we're all grown up, with kids of our own who want lightsabres for christmas, but there's nothing stopping us 30-somethings revisiting those epic battles of the past. Cop this lot:





All available from here (with a range of blade colours, naturally) for around $240.

(Thanks to fellow usenetter, The Merry Piper for the link)

A few things they never tell you about kids, or you can't grasp the truth of until it happens:

• Exactly how badly their poo smells
• Everything you don't want grabbed and slobbered on must go three feet above the floor by the time they learn to crawl
• The amount of clothes they actually get through
• How far a child can vomit, and how much
  
• How many times one child can ask "why?"
• The importance of them getting their own room REALLY early on.
• A baby's capacity for rolling off a given surface, no matter how wide it is
• The Houdini-shaming speed they can release themselves from buggy straps by the age of two
• How much more effective cuddles are than Calpol
• The importance of teething remedies that can be used for under 6-month-olds
• How easy it is to catch yourself enjoying playing baby games
• How hard it is to stop talking in that high pitched pidgin babytalk, even though they're bloody five and looking down their nose at you

There's more but I'm tired.

You bet your ass it's late!

I just watched the first two episodes of 24 season four and while it's looking a bit like a rehash of season three, it's looking pretty good, actually very good.

And it's got William Devane in it, whom I've followed and enjoyed ever since...christ this is embarrassing...he was in Knots Landing (my parents made me watch it, ok??) and I actually rate him quite highly as an actor.

There's a few people I rate that way actually, Roy Schieder for one, Sam Neill for another.

It seems like anything I've watched them in, no matter how mundane or downright bad, their performances have been enjoyable and consumate. Good, overlooked actors. It's good to see him again.

Now, I'm off to get some shuteye before dawn, and yet another school run.

Ironically, considering the events in the Indian Ocean, this year has been dubbed the "Year of the sea".

So here's a reminder that the Sea not only deals out death and destruction, but gives us life, sustenance and beauty:


(all images ©SeaBritain2005)

As you might notice, I'm a bit of a sucker for controversial films. What I haven't talked abut is that I'm a bit of a sucker for history documentaries too.

Over the last few years, mostly due to the BBC's habit of playing it almost constantly, I've watched a documentary series on Alexander the Great about five times. Believe me, it could have been a bloody sight more times.

Now I'm not claiming this docco was particularly good or bad, or indifferent, but it was interesting and informative about a classical figure I previously knew nothing about.

So imagine how my interest was piqued by reports that Oliver Stone was making a biopic. Imagine how that interest was magnified just lately by reports that it had bombed in the States because of the homosexual subtext.

So I did some digging. Not much, it has to be said. What follows is a taste, a miniscule taste, of the reviews I found on the Yahoo Movies site:

"Lunacraz" says:

And apparently, Alexander was really gay. Increibly gay. Im not saying this because I want to, but 1/3 of the movie is, honestly, pointing out how gay Alexander was. Maybe they're trying to show Platonism in process. But, to me, and to everyone else in the audience, the movie went out of its way to make Alexander really gay.

Dont see this movie... unless you want comedy.

Strike one for "Don't see this movie because it makes Alexander look gay"

"erving06us" says:

Instead of giving us exciting, grand battle sequences, he gives us wobbly camera angles and loads of dust, which simply disorient the viewer. Instead of showing us Alexander's interaction with the citizens in the lands he conquered, he gives us arguments between the soldiers and bizarre hallucinations involving Alexander's mother (Angelina Jolie) and father (Val Kilmer). I hoped the film would show us how Alexander's influence over the lands he conquered changed them for better or worse. Unfortunately, this film just breezes from one conquered civilization to the next with hardly any insight into those lands at all. Strangely, with such quick transitions from land to land, you would think there would be plenty of battle sequences. No such luck. There are only two battle sequences in the whole film and they last for a very short time. I was actually relieved when each battle ended because in an attempt to make the viewer feel as though they are right in the middle of things with close-up camera work, it simply made my head spin. I could not follow much of what was happening and could never really tell who was winning the fights.

Alexander didn't have a whole lot of interacting with the people he met. His troops did. Groups of them stayed behind in the countries he conquered and their descendants still live in those areas today, 2,500 years later. The transitions from land to land are wholly realistic. One thing that stood out from the documentary is how Alexander swept through Asia and India at a startling pace,

"silvanelf1982" says:

Perhaps the most interesting issues in the film lay with Alexander's personality. I won't go into detail, but if you see the film, expect some surprises that you might not expect to see on the big screen.

Herein lies the problem: While there's rife speculation and slash fiction galore about the ambiguous sexuality of hollywood superheroes, this never translates to the big screen. I've seen reports where an actors have turned down roles based on how their sexuality would be percieved as a result. The poor oversensetive Americans aren't expecting to see this aspect of Alexander's story, so when it turns up, it's magnified in the minds of the watchers until it becomes a vast controversy.

"john_amanda@sbcglobal.net" says:

It felt like I had accidently rented a video about the sexual ambiguities of Alexander the Great. I kind of wandered if this movie doesn't almost have a hidden agenda intended for it's viewers. Well that's my opinion of the first half of the movie since I couldn't stomach the next 1 1/2 hours.

"jcwestin" says:

So, let's boil it down to the "pink elephant in the room" no one wants to admit is there: The real issue that's driving most reviews is the depiction of Alexander as bisexual. The unconscious hysteria this idea is generating has created an outpouring of aggression...

Alexander is just a movie, but at least it's one that hits a cord, and in today's comfortably-numb cultural climate that's worth something.

"bwdycus" says:

Take away the Homo-erotic aspects of this film that made it very akward to watch, the film stinks...

I got this feeling that Oliver Stone was making fun of me. "Hey lets put out a huge piece of crap film with a whole lot of things that would make most of America cringe, put out previews of a historical epic with major stars, and see what idiots pay for the movie."

The New York Post says:

Embracing Alexander's bisexuality - though not to the point of actual guy-on-guy action - is the only subversive element in this otherwise surprisingly old-fashioned and plodding epic by the once-maverick Stone.

Stone and Farrell end up going too far - their light-in-the-sandals Alexander is often such a simpering, indecisive wuss that it's hard to accept he conquered most of the known world before his mysterious death at the age of 33 in 323 B.C.

The frequently risible script by Stone, Christopher Kyle and Laeta Kalogridis suggests Alexander conquered the world primarily to get away from his Mommie Dearest.

"What have I done to make you hate me so?" Olympia asks a teenage Alexander (Farrell looking even more ridiculous with Jolie, who is only one year older than him) in the film's funniest speech - delivered in a Bela Lugosi accent.

Meanwhile, Alexander's drunk and uncouth father, the one-eyed warrior King Philip (a bellowing Val Kilmer), who despises Olympias even more than his wife hates him, warns poor Alexander that "women are more dangerous than men."

With role models like these (and Christopher Plummer's doddering, Greeks-first Aristotle), it's no wonder that when Alexander marries an erotic dancer (Rosario Dawson) to produce an heir, he tries to rape her on their wedding night.

She replies with a knife to his throat, and soon he's merrily sharing a tent with Hephaistion and a topless castrato.

The Chicago Tribune says:

Stone's "Alexander" is an incredibly lurid movie, an epic that portrays Alexander and his contemporaries (not without justification) as a gallery of heroes, monsters, gods and goddesses, often with feet of steaming clay. And it paints Alexander himself as a prodigy of battle and visionary of world order, undone by his own unstoppable quest, by the hellish fury of his mother Olympias (Angelina Jolie, looking vampirish and insatiable) and the seething corruption of his times.

...he presents Alexander with greater sympathy than he lavishes on most political leaders: as an idealistic world-unifier who tried to meld his vast conquered empire together with cultural tolerance and enlightened policies but failed because of over-reaching.

Stone gives us an embarrassment of riches all the same, aided by a crack team that includes Peter Greenaway's designer Jan Roelfs and cinematographer Rodrigo Prieto ("Amores Perros"). He demonstrates certain gifts, for richly detailed yet imaginative ancient history, we might not have guessed from this son of the '60s. Aided by historical adviser Robin Lane Fox (whose popular 1973 biography is worth a reading before or after you see the film), this movie is an impressive feat of reconstruction. Even if it often looks like the maddest of fantasies - especially when it swoops us into bacchanalian revels in the Hanging Gardens of Babylon or cues a last staggering Indian elephant charge - the vision grabs us.

I think Stone wins his bet with history, but not without cost. Many will find the movie overwrought, oversexual or even ludicrous.

Alexander's bisexuality won't sit well with moral hard-liners. Devotees of the old Hollywood historical vision of a Cecil B. DeMille will certainly take violent offense.

So I'm fascinated. And I'm going to have to watch it. And I might even try and catch the "In the footsteps of Alexander The Great" docco on UKTV History one more time, just for the hell of it. Then, maybe a review. Watch this space.

I haven't said much about the Tsunami. Now it's time to let the pictures do the talking.

Tolkien's inspiration to be renamed
"The Shire Country Park"

Here's some quick statistics about the visitors that come here:

Visitors mostly come from search engines and other Blogs, presumably through the "Next Blog" button.

86% of visitors stay for less than five seconds. Of the ones that stay longer, they mostly stay about 20 minutes or more. Which is nice.

Surprisingly, less than three quarters of you are using Internet Explorer, with 26% of you using other browsers - mostly Firefox. Lucky I fixed that display bug a couple of months ago. Most of you are using Windows XP with the display settings on 1024x768 or 800x600 screen resolution. I use 1152x864, and aim for the site to be comfortable on 1024x768.

67% of you come from the UK or North America, with the remaining 43% coming from all over the place - Europe and the far east in the most part.

Most of you who come here from a search engine have searched for "Hedgewitch", which isn't surprising as I'm in the top results on Yahoo, Google and MSN.

And last week, the counter tipped the 2,000 hits stage.

All in all, a quiet year. I wish I could think of more to chatter on about, or I could come up with the wonderful paranoid rants and expositions that other bloggers come up with, but I haven't got the emotional energy or the time or the outrage one needs to compose one.

So thanks to everyone who visited, everyone who pops in and shoves straight off and mostly to my regular visitors.

Rest assured, I'll be carrying on doing just what i've been doing, trying to post something halfway interesting every day. And you guys can carry on doing just what you've been doing. If you're reading this through a RSS feed reader, leave a comment and let me know, huh?

I will say one thing though

To all those 85% who stay for less than five seconds

! ! ! S T A Y H E R E ! ! !

Wow! I never knew this! Winamp is dead!

The last members of the original Winamp team have said goodbye to AOL and the door has all but shut on the Nullsoft era, BetaNews has learned.

Only a few employees remain to prop up the once-ubiquitous digital audio player with minor updates, but no further improvements to Winamp are expected.

Winamp's abandonment comes as no surprise to those close to the company who say the software has been on life support since the resignation of Nullsoft founder and Winamp creator Justin Frankel last January.

The marriage of Nullsoft and AOL was always one of discontent. After AOL acquired the small company in 1999 for around $100 million, the young team of Winamp developers was assimilated into a strict corporate culture that begged for rebellion. Although Nullsoft was initially given a long leash by AOL, It wasn't long until the two ideologies collided.

Frankel and his team were accustomed to simply brainstorming ideas over coffee and bringing them to the masses without approval. So when Frankel and fellow Nullsoft developer Tom Pepper devised a decentralized peer-to-peer file sharing system, dubbed Gnutella, parent AOL was left in the dark.

Gnutella was unveiled in March 2000, much to the chagrin of an unprepared AOL; executives feared the program would encourage copyright infringement and damage the company's pending merger with Time Warner. AOL quickly clamped down on Gnutella, but not before the software's source code leaked. Gnutella-based alternatives soon followed, igniting a peer-to-peer land grab that has yet to subside.

But AOL knew it had to protect its investment and turn a profit from the freely available Winamp. Frankel and crew found themselves in hot water numerous times, but always escaped with little more than a proverbial slap on the wrist.

However, growing displeasure reached a boiling point with Nullsoft’s unsanctioned release of WASTE -- an encrypted file-sharing network -- in June 2003. Frankel threatened to resign after AOL removed WASTE, but remained with the company long enough to finish Winamp 5.0.

Frankel's departure followed AOL layoffs and the closure of Nullsoft's San Francisco offices in December 2003.

With AOL struggling to stave off declining subscriber numbers and 700 additional layoffs planned for next month, the company’s focus has shifted away from supporting acquisitions such as Winamp.

Despite the somber farewell, Nullsoft's former masterminds are proud of their accomplishments. Winamp helped start a digital audio revolution and boasts an incredible 60 million users per month.

After a disappointing Winamp3, Nullsoft developers returned to the drawing board and completed long-standing goals with the release of Winamp 5.0 in late 2003.

Nullsoft's Shoutcast, which pioneered audio streaming over the Internet, is called "the Net's best secret" by its creator Tom Pepper and has reached 170,000 simultaneous users accounting for 70 million hours of listening each month.

For its part, AOL says it remains committed to Winamp, stating it is "a thriving product that AOL continues to support and will continue to support."

But without those who poured their heart and soul into building the software, Winamp seems destined to meet a fate similar to fellow audio player Sonique, after Lycos saw the departure of its development team. Sonique has stagnated for years, and development ceased altogether last March.

I've used Winamp for years and loved it every minute of that time. It's one of the first couple of things I put on when I reinstall windows. I'm gutted!

AOL has plenty of blood on its hands, doesn't it? Time-Warner, Netscape and now Nullsoft. And people still use them. Shame on you!

I know a lot of my longer posts have weak endings. This is for two (or three reasons):

1) I never know how to wrap things up and even in real life end up just trailing off, like....well, y'know...yeah, anyway...

2) It usually means I started it before the kids were around and now they're sitting on my lap, so after a half hour gap, I need to wrap it up as quickly as possible before someone sits on the mouse and clicks the "close window" button.

One to watch on Ebay: Woman needed for unwanted Husband

Thanks to Seany for this link to the simple wonders of Anagrams!

Here's a few choice ones I've discovered so far:

My Name becomes

"Stolen unit."
"Lout in nest."
"Nut lies not."
"Intent soul."
"Tone in lust."
"Tone in slut."
"Tune in lots."
"Net until so."
"Not. Utensil."
"Nun toilets."
"Tent in soul."
"Stout linen."
"No tune list."
"Nuts oil net."

Tony Blair becomes:

"Tory in Lab."
"Tiny Labor."
"Only a brit."
"Liar by ton."
"Lot brainy?"
"Rainy Blot."

George W Bush becomes:

"Bush ego grew."
"He grew bogus."
""W": he bugs Gore."
"e.g. bug whores?"
"Bugger, who's 'e?"
"Ogre hugs web."
"Whose bugger?"
"Hog sewer bug."
"Huge row begs."
"Urge web hogs."

The Father in Law becomes:

"I'm raw, shrill acid."
"I'm arid, arch swill."
"I charm wild liars."

The Missus becomes:

"A still, ethical worm."
"Well! I'm a scholar tit."
"Cow shit! I'm all alert."
"Amoral till witches."
"I'm white-collar salt."
"All-time wit scholar."
"Small, heroical twit."
"Hell! Warm social tit."
"What clitoral slime."
"Witch or a still male."
"Well! It's coital harm."
"Hell! I'm coital warts."

Good stuff!

Stephen Donaldson
The Runes of the Earth

Linden Avery is a smalltown doctor with a secret. Ten years ago she witnessed the murder of a leper who claimed he had visited a fantastic land where his white gold wedding ring is a powerful talisman, mud heals wounds, pottery can be fixed with song, wood burns without consumption and the people are so attuned to their world that they can see health.

Ten years ago a group of fanatics kidnapped his wife. He and Linden followed them to a forest clearing behind his house. When they threaten to sacrifice her, Covenant intervenes and gets a knife in his chest. He falls into the bonfire they lit and Linden falls too, striving to save him.

As they fall, they find themselves translated into Covenants Land, but it's not the Land he remembers. The natural Law which made The Land magical has been destroyed by the Land's enemy, Lord Foul the Despiser, and a horriffic corruption of the natural order which the people call the Sunbane pervades The Land.

Covenant is outraged and leads a quest to beat the Sunbane and vanquish Lord Foul once and for all. For months he and Linden strive to complete his quest, with Giants, malevolent spirits, superhuman guardians for companions and Lord Foul's minions, the incorporeal Ravers harrying them, poisoning Covenant and sparking a reaction which causes him to tap into the elusive Wild Magic in his ring, the use of which jeopardises the whole of existence. All the while, he and Linden strive to come to terms with the fact that, in the real world, he is already dead.

Linden is traumatised by everything she sees, being the only person in The Land who has "health sense". She is tortured by the sickness she sees and seduced by the deep love Covenant demonstrates for The Land.

Linden learns that she too is capable of great power within the land and after Covenant sacrifices himself in one final battle with Lord Foul, she uses her healing skills and Land-born power to banish the Sunbane and rescue The Land. As Covenant dies, she is sent back to the real world, to be confronted with Covenant's corpse and the mutilated members of the cult which killed him.

Ten years pass.

Covenant's wife has been sent insane by the events surrounding his murder. After his eighteenth birthday, Covenant's son returns to claim her from the hospital where she had been held. After talking to him, Linden realises that he somehow knows all about The Land and that he intends to attempt to travel there. He abducts his mother and Linden's adopted son, who was a child member of the cult that killed his father.

He returns to the place of his father's murder, with Linden and the police in pursuit. There's a standoff and a shootout while a thunderstorm rages around the sacrificial altar where Covenant was killed. His son is gunned down just as lightning hits the alter. A bullet hits Linden in the chest and as she falls, she is taken to The Land, where she learns that not only has Covenant's son been taken, but his insane wife, who still holds her own white gold wedding ring, but Linden's son too. With nothing but a madman and her memories to guide her, she sets off to find her son and to confront Lord Foul, who taunts her through his possession of her companion and who is holding Covenant's wife captive, making use of her madness and her ring to ravage the land with strange destructive vortexes.

I've read and re-read the first two Chronicles many times and love the story. I've looked forward to this book for a long time. And I want so dearly to not say that it was a disappointment. But I think it was.

It's not so much that this book contains so many changes as to make The Land unrecognisable. It just takes so damn long to get going. In the first chronicles, Covenant takes a chapter to get brought to The Land, while in Runes, Donaldson has taken meticulous care to set up an intricate and convoluted explanation why and how four people get transported.

In fact, "meticulous" and "intricate" could be the best words to describe this book. The plot is flabby with vast tracts of explanation and exposition. He spends so much time explaining the convoluted history he wove in the first six books that the progression of events is brought to a crawl.

I can accept that this is the first book in a four book series and that I really can't make a true judgement on how well it works until I can read all four books back-to-back, but while it left me wanting to read the next book, it also left me frustrated and unfulfilled due to the chugging pace and (to me, anyway) uneccessary over-explanation.

I want to like it. I can't say "enjoy" because the very nature of Thomas Covenant and Linden Avery preclude enjoyment. I think once I've read it a few more times and allowed the subtleties of the plot to sink in that I might get to like it, but for now, I need to sit down and digest it once again while probably taking notes.

This is not a good book to start with. If you haven't read the previous two Chronicles of Thomas Covenant, this book won't work at all for you. And unfortunately, if you have read them, you'll find it just as unfulfilling as I did.

All I can say is "Roll on the next three books".

Leisure
W.H. Davies (1870 - 1940)

What is this life if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare.

No time to stand beneath the boughs
And stare as long as sheep or cows.

No time to see, when woods we pass,
Where squirrels hide their nuts in grass.

No time to see, in broad daylight,
Streams full of stars, like skies at night.

No time to turn at Beauty's glance,
And watch her feet, how they can dance.

No time to wait till her mouth can
Enrich that smile her eyes began.

A poor life this if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare.

(This is the poem I read out at my Uncle's funeral. The thinking behind it was that maybe if we'd took a little more time to listen to that quiet, private man, he'd still be alive)

To start the New Year off, here's a couple of links to stories I think will affect more than a few things this year:

America redefines torture

The Iraq-born rift between the US and UN is affecting the Tsunami aid effort (see here and here). While people are mostly talking reconciliation and denial, the truth seems to be that the US administration now holds an ingrained hatred of Kofi Annan which only seems to have got worse since his stance against the legality of the invasion of Iraq.

There's allegations aplenty that the US's response to the tsunami disaster has been not much more than a reaction to UN criticism.

This is something to watch this year, I reckon. The implications of the US facing off more openly against the UN could have wide-ranging consequences. Look at the bullshit the US has spread about Saddam throughout its own people, with a high percentage truly believing he had something to do with the Sept 11th attacks. If the same stories start getting spread about the UN, the consequences could be a cold war with the US finally showing its hand as the aggressive Neo-Colonialist Imperialists they so desperately want to be. By not showing the maturity and responsibility their position requires, they may get the isolation the insisted on 80 years ago.

America is so completely integrated with the rest of the world that most countries have forgotten that they used to get along perfectly well without them. Look at what we import from the States: stuff which originally came from far east, repackaged and resold.

We might just be looking at the dawn of a new age in propaganda as we see how the media deals with this.